Crank Dat Soulja Bot!
by NinjaLifeguard
Summary: Starscream learns how to TRULY use Youtube...and hath taught himself..a very...very..questionable dance...can the Autobot's stand up to an army of Con's crankin?


OMG! This is gonna be EPIC!!! Okay, for those who know that freakin' dance called "the soulja boy" and the song. THIS IS FOR YOU!!! LOL…This was hard to write between laughs!! I have edited the lyrics JUST in CASE..some mod gets a hissy fit..

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"SOULJA BOY TELLEM' OH! WATCH ME CRANK IT WATCH ME ROLL! WATCH ME CRANK THE SOULJA BOY THEN SUPERMAN DAT OH! NOW WATCH ME YOUUU!! (CRANK DAT SOULJA BOY!) YOUUUU!"-

Starscream narrowed his eyes watching these.._gangster_s_…_as humans called them dance to something called, _the Soulja boy_…on a website called, _Youtube…_They were good, yes…REAL good…but as long as he'd be around they would only be second best…because you see…Starscream can dance better than any _gangsta_ ever did…and so…he decided that HE would learn this…_soulja boy_ dance!

"Humans think that they are _soooo good!"_ cackled Starscream, "I just can't WAIT to see their sniveling faces when I _show them up_ as they say!"

Smirking, Starscream took a gangsta's stance and waited for the cue music…

_YOU!!!!!!!! background music_ _aaaaaaaaaahhhhhHHHHHHHHH! SOULJA BOY TELLEM' OH!_

Starscream bounced slightly as he kicked his rightleg back and slapped his foot with his opposite hand. Rolling his arm slightly on the right first and making a fist he repeated with his left arm.

_WATCH ME CRANK AND WATCH ME ROLL! WATCH ME CRANK THAT SOULJA AND SUPERMAN DAT OH!!_

Starscream smirked, why not add a few…_special features_ to this new dance. He bounced around slightly again as he swung his leg over then brought it up and patted it with his left hand. Then as this Soulja boy said Superman Starscream hovered with one arm out in a fist and the other back…mimicking..superman..and grinning like mad.

_NOW WATCH ME YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOW WATCH ME YOUUUUUUU!!!_

Starscream bounced three times to the right, hunched over slightly, then three times to the left, then to the right again.

Suddenly Starscream's door hissed open and Blackout's jaw dropped. Starscream stopped in mid dance his wide grin turning to a scowl. He hadn't noticed he was still hunched over slightly…his rear end sticking out that had previously been bouncing about with joy.

Blackout stared at Starscream in utter horror. "WHAT THE SLAG ARE YOU DOING!!!???"

Starscream pulled Blackout further into his room and locked his door. Blackout of course, panicked and ran to the other side of the room.

"OH PRIMUS!! I KNEW IT! I KNEW YOU WERE HOMOSE"- Blackout didn't get to finish. Starscream had slapped a metal hand over his faceplates smirking ever so slightly.

"Hold your tongue Blackout!" he hissed, "Now that I am the leader you MUST obey me…therefore…I want YOU to learn this.._Soulja boy_ dance with me! Then we will teach it to the ENTIRE DECEPTICON FORCE!! AND LEAVE THE AUTOBOTS ALL…" Starscream paused his databanks searching for the correct gangsta term, "DISSED!" he concluding beaming.

Blackout glared at Starscream, "Your kidding…right.."

Starscream growled, "NO!! I am NOT kidding!!"

Blackout sighed. He really had no choice..

_SOULJA BOY TELLEM' OH WATCH ME CRANK AND WATCH ME ROLL!_

Starscream yelped, "GET OFF OF MY FOOT IDIOT!"

"WELL MOVE!!" Blackout was frustrated, his propellers were getting in the way. "AND GET YOUR BOUNCING BUM OUT OF MY FRAGGING FACE!!"

Starscream roared, "I'LL PUT MY BUTT IN YOUR FACE IF I WANT TO!!"

Blackout was bewildered and distanced himself by dancing away from Starscream who seemed to follow him.

"NO Blackout! WE MUST STAY UNIFIED!" Starscream wailed.

"I DON'T LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT!!" screamed a panicking Blackout. "YOUR GAY!!!!!"

Starscream roared in rage, "I AM _NOT_ GAY!!!!!!!!"

When they both had perfected the dance….they went off to teach it to EVERYONE else…

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Optimus sat slumped at his computer reading detailed notes of Mission City. He heard a tentative knock and turned around.

"Come in.."

Bumblebee stepped through the doorway…he looked slightly distraught.

Optimus scrunched his face up in concern, "Bumblebee…whats wrong?"

Wordlessly Bumblebee walked over to Prime's computer and pulled up his E-mail. Opening a message from the decepticons that read in Starscream's handwriting,

_Dear Autoscums,_

_I and the other Decepticons would like to show yo who da real gangsta's of dis planet be! Therefore we be putting yo afts to shame…cuz yo can't dance like us soulja boy's! So….here be yo humiliation….err…YO!_

Optimus raised his eyeridges. Clicking the link….they were takin' to the beautiful world of…Youtube.

Cue music.

The stage was dark…save for the 100 pairs of glowing red eyes. The lights were slowly brightening to reveal the gangsta poses each con was pulling.

_ahhhhhHHHHHHHH!! SOULJA BOY TELLEM' OH!_

It was…_terrible_…the ENTIRETY of the decepticon army was dancing to this Soulja boy!! Starscream was in front bouncing and smirking. Cyclounus was in one of the back grounds trying to booty bump Devastator who growled and socked him in the face. Blackout looked completely terrified and was slowly dancing away from Starscream who looked over angrily and bounced toward him. Barricade was doing as he was told but looked completely dead and Frenzy was doing the worm in front of them all while spitting out cybertronian curses. The two seekers other than Starscream were doing the Party boy on either side of the group.

Optimus stared down at the screen in complete horror. This was worse then when Megatron had done a victory dance with a cube of energon after they had defeated the Autobot army for the first time. Somehow Ratchet and Ironhide had found their way into Optimus's quarters and were staring down at the screen as well. Ironhide wore a grim smile and was shaking his head in dismay. Ratchet kept repeating 'Wha..wha..why..' and his face held that of a girl who'd seen a very large spider….all in all….I guess cons' will be cons'!

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Well…what did you think?? I liked it! XD…poor Blackout:3 


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